What Not To Wear

Lately I've become the victim of a cable TV show.

I began watching a show that has two ridiculously, grinning hosts whose main purpose is to tell unassuming individuals what utter fools they have been making of themselves, simply due to what attire they put on their bodies. This started an inner panic. I mean, what if someone I knew volunteered me for such a humiliation? To be honest, it could happen.

You see...

I can't remember exactly when it began but I do remember where. I was shopping at the local mall, strolling around, checking out the sights and there IT was. The most amazing, wonderfully fabulous head ornament I had ever seen. Imagine, a pink fuzzy, feathery headband with a silver lame princess hat attached, decorated with neon pink star shaped sequins that were sewn all over, ending with more pink (netting this time) that plumed from the top and made a clever little veil. I was in love the second I saw it. So I bought it.

Now, the naive may have wondered, "Why?", being that my own two children had become much too old for such silly dress-up shenanigans, not to mention are boys. But those who knew me (like my hubby) just shook their heads. They realized a new fashion trend for Miss T had begun. Hats!!

Hats. What a wonderful way to dress-up a dreary day. Think about it. Looking dumpy? Bad hair day? Kinda didn't think the sweater looked that bad when you put it on? Wear a wacky hat...who's gonna notice when you are radiant from the neck up?

Hats are fun. Hats have personality. Elementary school aged kids have more than enough fun and personality, so why not wear something that helps you to be on their level of a fun personality? I could go on forever about the wonderment of hats and what a great addition to my classroom they have been.

Yet, I digress.

Having now explained my work attire, you can see why I was struck with fear while watching that TV show. Maybe I had made a mistake. According to those TV hosts I was not dressing appropriately for a person of my position and stature. Not to mention, what if someone DID send my name to these people?? They may be coming to jump out at me any minute!!! AAAAAAAAHHH!

I did the only rational thing I could think of. I began a counter attack. I refused to wear my beloved headgear. Even though it was drizzling outside I did NOT wear my rainbow striped umbrella hat. National holiday??? You didn't see me in my Statue of Liberty hat along with matching sunglasses-did you? No way! I became a newer, more professional teacher...and I HATED IT! I mean, who cares what you look like on the outside if you are miserable on the inside-right?

So I caved.

I gave it up and immediately felt better. Once back at school I happily put on my King Tut hat in metalic gold and black! Next day, out came the sunflower hats in gilttery rainbow colors. Yes. All seemed right with the world again.

Since that day I realized...maybe there are people who know more than others about what NOT to wear. But if you want to have fun-come talk to me, I'm the expert about what TO wear! Enjoy.